Mindset Shifts: From Challenges to Honors

Mindset is my word of the year. It has become central to how I navigate life, both personally and professionally. As I work to shift my own perspectives, I also strive to help others do the same—especially when it comes to shifting how we view the challenges that come our way.

This week, I had the pleasure of listening to Nikki Garry, a transformation coach and speaker, who shared insightful thoughts on resilience. She had many valuable tips, but one stood out to me. Ahead of her talk, she asked the 200 of us in the room to write down a challenge we had faced in life and had to overcome. She then read a few of these challenges aloud: death, illness, job loss, depression, bullying, and many others. And then, she said something that struck me deeply: view these challenges as “an honor from God, who chose us to overcome them so we could help others.”

I’ve faced my share of challenges—being an outcast in elementary school, losing my mom to cancer when I was 14, grieving friends lost to suicide and overdoses, dealing with job losses, and facing medical challenges. Despite all this, I've mostly kept a half-full glass perspective. I’ve always felt blessed to have overcome these obstacles, coming out stronger on the other side. I want to help others do the same, both personally and professionally.

For years—decades, even—I’ve heard the phrase, “God doesn’t give us more than we can handle.” Perhaps someone said it to me after my mom passed, and it’s something I’ve always believed. It resonates with me because I’ve overcome many challenges, becoming stronger, more empathetic, and hopefully more inspiring to others.

But I had never thought of my challenges as an honor from God—until now. When I shift my mindset just slightly and adopt the spirit of a coach or counselor (not just as a job title, but as a role I take on in life), I know I am on the right journey. As a business coach, my focus is to help business owners reach their goals through strategic planning. But as a human being, I’m drawn to people who need help with challenges that go deeper than strategy.

What’s the biggest challenge you’ve faced in your life? How did you handle it? Did your emotions play a significant role in the beginning? Maybe you were angry, bitter, or sad—perhaps those emotions still linger, even years later. Were you able to share your story and help others who were going through something similar? Or when someone shares a similar story, does your empathy kick in, and you find yourself offering your time, your shoulder, your ear?

If you answered “yes,” then I encourage you to consider your hardship an honor. Don’t let shame, bitterness, or anger consume too much of your mental and emotional space. Instead, be grateful for what you learned from that hardship, and share that experience with others. It’s part of your story, and as humans, we grow by learning from each other.

If the answer is “no,” I suggest starting with someone you trust deeply—a close friend, for example. You never know how your story might impact that person, and when you’re ready, sharing it may help others too.

After my hysterectomy and later my double mastectomy, I kept my story limited to only a few people. At the time, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to share the reasons behind my decisions. But today, I realize that my story may help others. People often say I’m brave for undergoing the surgery and proactively protecting myself from future cancer risks. I disagree. The surgery itself was easy. Talking about it was the hard part. What if someone judges me? Maybe I’ll only share with women and not men. But when I stopped worrying about judgment (which was mostly in my head), I opened up, hoping that my story might help someone who is considering body-altering surgery.